Pretty Pointless

Blogs. Why do so many people have them? What do people blog about?

Well, I can say that most teenagers from Malaysia just blogs about what they did that day. They also have blogs to bitch about people. It releases stress that way. And sadly, this includes me.

Personally, I find my blog pointless and meaningless. And I find certain peoples blog's too. No offense. But think about it. All we write about in out blogs are what-we-did-today posts. Which are pretty pointless right? (some people, no saying all) IDK, this is just what I think.

So because of this, I've actually been trying to stop writing what-I-did-today posts...

but then I just can't find anything to blog about.

Hence, I won't be blogging much anymore.

(Am thinking of deleting this blog. I suck in writing. Plus, it's uninteresting and pointless).

The pain we all go through.

Have you ever hated yourself?

Ever found yourself doing something you swore you would never do?

Ever realised you've turned into one of those people you hated so badly once upon a time?

Ever found yourself wanting to be someone else?

Ever found yourself being someone you were once not?

Yes, some people do change. Maybe for the better. Or maybe not. But, when someone comes up to you and has the guts to tell you that you've changed for the worse, oh god, take that as a wake up call. And try to change and don't give the fucking reason

"This is who I am, and I can't change who I am".

because that's total bullshit. Of course you can change! Everyone can, it's just a matter of you admitting the problem and having the initiative to bloody change.

So let me ask you again...

Is how you are now who you thought you'd be? Are you proud of who you are? Of how you've become? Ask yourself that.

"If you wanna make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change".
-Man in the mirror by Michael Jackson.

It's a girl thing.

Blegh. I'm sucha' girl. What am I talking about?

MOOD SWINGS.

I swear. It's pissing me off. I get frustrated and sad over the littlest things. And at times, I even burst into tears. Then I start laughing cause I ask myself

"Why am I crying, again?"

Therefor, ... I'm sucha' girl.

Anyway, my minds been awfully odd these couple of days. It's like, I over think stuff and I get frustrated easily AND I have very, VERY random i.m.a.g.i.n.a.t.i.o.n.

Hahahaha.

I just remembered. Today, during Science, Science teacher showed us this on YouTube,



Blop, blop, blop.

What time is it?

23rd June 1994, 11:11 p.m. - 23rd March 2009, 6:03 p.m.

Isn't it scary, how fast time pasts by? Second turns to minute, minutes turns to hours, hours turns to days, days turn to months, months turn to years...

We're all moving. We never stop. Even if we try to, we can't.

Time stops for no one. And that's a known fact.

sigh.

Try staying in a room which is completely empty except a wall clock that ticks loudly. I swear, you'd go mad. I know I would. Cause you can practically HEAR time passing you by.

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick...

Confessions of an internet addict.

The internet. This how I began.

It all started in 2004. In my grandparents house in Puncak Prima, Seri Hartamas. I saw my brother using the computer in the guest room, so I asked what was he doing and he said... 'Friendster'. At first I just looked at the screen with so much confusion. So then I asked my brother "Abang, what's friendster?". So he started explaining to me what it was, and I got more interested in it. So my brother helped me make an account. Although, as you can imagine, it was as dull as ever. It was just a profile with 1 friend which obviously was my brother. I didn't even know how to use the computer at that time.

That was practically the first time I used the internet. Haha, but I never logged in that friendster account of mine again. Probably cause I didn't know how to. So after that I used the internet for emailing. Haha. Yes, I sent emails to my best friend. My email was blossom something. Blossom_sufianna? or something like that. (Blossom from PPG btw).

Next, was the MSN MESSENGER. It all began when I started to text this boy I was fond of. And he asked me whether I had Msn Messenger, so it'd be cheaper then texting. And I said yes. Though I didn't at that time.. So I just used my brothers account. Kitkat_johan@hotmail.com. Went online often just to chat with this boy.

I then decided to make my own email for MSN. I asked help from my cousin over at her house, and she came up with justagirl_94. And i've been using that account ever since.

Around this time, almost everyone in my year had msn and friendster. So I started adding people and made a friendster account again. Of course it started dull cause at that time I couldn't really go online often. But a few months after that, my dad got a laptop. So thats when I started going online much more often and soon, I became an expert with friendster and msn.

During that time, friendster was so the 'in thing'. Everyone making their profile nicer with layouts and people comparing who has more testi's and more friends. Haha. Around this time, my friendster was fully pimped and was super fly.

And then.... the era of blogs started. Everyone started a blog and I was one of them without a doubt. Haha.

So it started from,

Emails-> Friendster -> MSN -> Blogger :)

I swear, if I were to look back at how I was with the internet back then, i'd laugh. I mean with all the lame friendster profile and the HORRIBLE way I wrote in my blog! and not to forget all the lame websites I use to go on :p Haha.

Sigh, things has definitely change..

Thats my story of how I began being an internet addict. Whats yours? :)

Heart shaped bruises.

Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tueday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Three days has gone pass, and I've been doing practically nothing. Yesterday passed by with me watching DVD's while doing science notes. My parents wants me to find someone who I can stroke with (tennis). But I can't seem to find anyone. Ok, so maybe I just don't want to even try to look for someone.. haha. Sigh. I got tuition tonight. H.E.L.P.



I've watched Center Stage like probably 10 times? I never get sick of it. The Final Dance is what motivated me to not quit ballet when I was young. IT STILL GIVES ME MOTIVATION BTW :D

Midnight writing.

It's currently one o'clock in the morning and I got to wake up at seven tomorrow due to Ballet classes at nine.

You know, 2009 is turning out to be not so bad :) I mean, despite all the pain I've gone through this year, I'm still smiling. 2009 isn't that much different than all the other years. The suns still shinning, the rain still pours, flowers still bloom,.. so whats the difference? :) Why should I be all upset? I mean, SO WHAT if I have less friends in school. That's only cause I'm new. THINGS CHANGE.

Dear 2009,

I guess I could say we started off on the wrong foot. I hated you without out a reason and for this, I apologize. Do you think we could start over? I hope so, cause I really don't see why I should hate you. I mean just cause this year is different, doesn't make it right for me to hate you right? It isn't your fault. Plus, I guess, things change. I just got to adapt to it, and look at the bright side of things.

New year resolutions (or what is left of the year): BE HAPPY, DON'T WORRY. Cause very little thing's gonna be alright. :)

I'm ONLY 14! Why the hell am I so stressed out? I should be CAREFREE. I should be always happy. The only thing that's suppose to make me all tensed up is PMR!

So not to self: FORGET ALL STUPID PROBLEMS. They don't matter, Nana.

p/s: I'm proud to say, I'm over you, and have no such feelings towards you anymore :)

DID YOU KNOW FACT ONE: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious means something? It means "Atoning for educability through delicate beauty". super- "above", cali- "beauty", fragilistic- "delicate", expiali- "to atone", and docious- "educable".

LOL

What time is it?

SUMMERTIME.
MID-TERM HOLIDAY! :D

/Saturday/Sunday/Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday/Friday/Saturday/Sunday/

Excited? ;)

Girls make boys cry.

I knew I had CCA meetings today. I knew I had to go through auditions in order to stay in Performing Arts. I knew I had to prepare a dance routine. I knew I would be sent off to another club if I were to not make the cut. But, what did I decide to do? IGNORE MY FRIGGIN' BRAIN. T.T And that lead to PANIC.CHAOS.NERVOUSNESS. Yes, I went to school without a dance, nor a song. Went up to the fifth floor during the third period, did I try to make up a routine while others auditioned? NO. Instead I was watching the other girls practicing their audition piece. So when they finally called my name, I just told Angela I'd use the previous girl's song and do it freestyle, but without me noticing, I ended up doing BALLET . Oh, and the girl's song was KOREAN. (I think. Well, it was foreign la). Very catchy though. FREESTYLE BALLET WITH A KOREAN POP SONG. God, I must be nuts :) Anyway, it'd be a miracle if I got in. Well what i'm trying to say is, DO NOT IGNORE YOUR BRAIN. :)

Here's the song. ISN'T IT BLOODY CATCHY?


Hahahahahahaha.

It's the HAPPY POST !

This is, The Happy Post. The stuff that makes me happy. READ IT, it'll make you all warm and fuzzy for the rest of the day :D

Rainbows, clouds, flowers, cats, rabbits, stars, moon, sun, rain, grass, pink, blue, white, yellow, green, purple, pillows, Disney, teddy, candy, cereal, sandwiches, kisses, hugs, love, kodak moments, memories, 7Up, Pasta, lasagna, music, dreams, milo, dinosaurs, cows, friends, bookshops, stationary, clothes, shoes, AISYAH, dancing, ribbons, music box, carousel, ponies, HARRY POTTER, photo's, perfumes, beds, windows, traffic jams while raining, peanut butter and jam, bread and butter, family, Dominos Pizza, Nandos, Starbucks meet ups, happy news, Happy Tree Friends, YouTube, Mozella, Jack Johnson, John Mayer, The Killers, Muse, Mayday Parade, iPod, garden, printscreen moments, 2004, 2006, Sekolah Kebangsaan Bukit Damansara, 1M, 2M, 3M, 4B, 5K, 6P, long lost friends, Madeline, Banana in Pajamas, hope, inspiration, cotton candy, Skittles, Hershey, Little Miss Sunshine, movies, Skype, slurpee, maggi, mamaks, lunch dates, finding out there is someone else like me, butterfly, traffic lights, colorful panties, photography, tennis, ballet, art, literature, musical plays, love songs, sunday songs, techno songs, making faces, jokes, i.m.a.g.i.n.a.t.i.o.n, public holidays, early mornings, late nights, midnight movies, scissors, smileys, hearts, doodles, drawing, coloring, socks, rubber ducks, late night hot showers, body lotion, GOOD GRADES, fairness in this unfair world, Distinctions, princess, new friends, STARSHIP GALACTICA, long road trips...

NO FUCKING MOSQUITO'S IN THIS GOD DAMN WORLD. Go die la all mosquito's. Stop sucking people's blood, boleh tak? :(

cookies, caramel frap, cookie and cream, Baskin robbins, tip top, hockey pockey, comics, drama, peace, dancing in the rain, weirdness, specialness, serendipity, Facebook (LMAO), saved texts, humming nursery rhymes, pretty birds chirping, FLAMINGOS, fishy!, dragonfly, charm bracelets, scrapbooks, diary, trees, ..... sighh i'm happy enough :)

This is the world we live in. A cruel one.

Do you ever think why the world is so cruel? And so corrupted now? Why there is so much evil? Now, evil is no longer lurking in the shadows, my friend, they are among us, in the open, in broad daylight. Bad things can happen wherever, whenever. Which is pretty sad. It's such an unsafe world now. Kids can't just play wherever they want. They must be supervised at all times.

Have you heard about human trafficking? Human trafficking is the recruitment of people for the purpose of slavery. The victims are normally recruited by deception, fraud, coercion, or by abduction. Women are forced to become prostitutes. For the kids, usually beggars or will be internationally adopted. If the kid is a girl, they too can sometimes be force to become prostitutes. Of course, once they abduct you, they bring you to a friggin' different country so you won't be familiar with the place and what not. ISN'T IT SCARY?! Omg, man. It sure hell is scary to me. Imagine being abducted and shipped off to India and you're force to BEG or sell yourself for money for the bastards who abducted you. Scary la :(



(The movie series I watched)

Lets keep it a secret.

So, I just finished tuition a couple minutes ago, and something my teacher said gave me hope.

Alah bisa, tegal biasa.

It sorta means like, it may be hard at first, but you'll get use to it. So I'm relating this to my problem in fitting in my new school. I'm sure it'll get better right? BUT, if things are as miserable by end of this year, I'm surely to try to change school. I'm sure it'll get better though, right? RIGHT? :(

Sigh.

Confession: I miss you. So much. I wish we could start over.

Try this #1

Try waking up listening to this song. It'll definitely make your day a good day :)

The first chapter of the endless tales of Sufianna.

Isn't it a beautiful day? The birds are chirping, it's drizzling, the suns up, I absolutely adore these kind of days :) I woke up with a smile on my face. Knowing it'll be a lovely day cause I could hear the rain pouring. I had toast and egg for breakfast. Went up, showered and started doing Math. Wouldn't it be just awesome to have every Monday like this? I say this because, I despise Mondays. It's the starting of the week. Always 4 more days to the weekends and it's always a tad bit harder to go through the day. Another reason why I hate Mondays are cause it's the only day I'm alone for tuition. But, the Monday today is different. I'm loving today even though it's a Monday. Probably cause there isn't any school today, and cause tuition today has been changed to BM revision, meaning I won't be alone! Hooray! Haha. Yes, why can't all Mondays be like this? :)

The suns up, birds are chirping, but it's drizzling, there must be a rainbow coming my way :)

A new beginning is what we all need.

I'm Sufianna.

I'm a girl with many dreams. Often said to be in her own world. I choose not to get myself involved with what I'm going through in reality. Because I know most of what happens to me in reality now at this age I can live without. All the endless bitch fights, all the hatred, all the unnecessary problems reality gives me is stupid and unnecessary. I try to control my feelings as much as I can. Try to overcome my sadness whenever I'm feeling sad, by telling myself I'm happy. I'm not lying to myself. I just prefer not to show my feelings. I prefer to cry alone. But it's nice to have a shoulder to cry on at times.

I wake up in the morning telling myself it'll be a good day. I wake up, singing happy jolly tunes to get myself hyped up for the day. But when someone purposely tries to make my day a tad bit miserable, I smile in hopes of sending this message through, "No, your little immature stunt did not make me cry, nor did it make me sad. Whereas, it made my day. It made me laugh. I laughed to your immaturity and to your failed attempt to make me sad".

I love Disney cartoons. Don't get me wrong though, I like the OLD Disney. The classics. Like Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Hercules, Mulan, Lion King, etc. Not the shit the make now like HSM, or Camp Rock. (No Offense though). I think Disney Classic cartoon had lots of moral values in them, and I think kids who watched them those days were be moved and were be inspired by them. I know I was. I mean think about it, back then you'd hear kids go, "I wanna be like Hercules, cause I know I too can go the distance" (Ok, A bit dramatic?), but now, you'd hear something like this, "OMG, I wanna be Gabriella! She's so pretty". Like total wtf. Think about it.

This is my blog. My space to express how I feel. I'm the owner, the author. So whatever is written I hope you guys understand that I don't care if you think it's wrong or if you think it's stupid or whatever, cause it's how I feel and it's up to me. It's my blog. So deal with it. Do not judge me if you don't know me. I'm nice. I swear :) I'm a very bubbly person. I'm a 24/7 happy jolly girl. But sometimes reality just pisses me off.

I'm not weird. I'm just different. And guess what? You are too. So shut up.

One more thing, I like pies :D